i think i have stumbled into phase 3 of this transition: loneliness.
there are several women here that i truly enjoy being around and am eagerly getting to know on a deeper level. oh, but the important work of friendship takes so long! and frankly, i miss the ease of relationships that began years ago, where together we have experienced heartache, joy, struggle, pain, laughter, and of course tears--all those shared experiences that only make good friendships richer and better. i miss the comfort of seasoned friendships where there is very little temptation to do the "please, please like me" dance because we already know we are loved, crazy baggage and all, and there is simply no need. i miss walking into dcf and feeling like i've come home, where there are people who are just as raw and broken and passionate and hungry for jesus as i am.
we've been able to spend time with some of our dear friends recently, friends whom we consider family. it's been refreshing and reorienting to be around them, and my heart has relaxed into this familiar geography of knowing and being known.
being known--this is all any of us ever really wants, isn't it?
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Our friend Anne Lamott said hopefully:
"I'm human, you're human, let me greet your humanness. Let's be people together for a while."
I pray you will be seen and that you will see, together.
I miss you too, Miska. We all love you and miss you.
On many levels, this sucks.
beautiful words, miska. i wish i had some witty response, but i really don't. i do know how you feel, though, and i guess that is something.
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